(Last month I took a goal setting course and wanted to share what I learned.)
In the past, if you’ve had a tough time seeing your goals come to fruition it may have been because of one of the following: You put too much pressure on achieving them.
Your goal(s) were too vague.
You relied on motivation, self-discipline and willpower.
You overwhelmed yourself with too many goals.
You expected them to happen within a year long time frame which caused attachment (similar to point 1).
The goals weren’t integrated into your identity.
But, that was then and this is now.
I have a sneaking suspicion that 2023 is going to be the year of some major changes for you.
Now on with the show!
STEP ONE:
Reflect on the previous year.
I’ve always skipped this step. I resisted looking over the year and/or thought I wouldn’t remember everything. This year I sat down and looked back at 2022 and wrote down anything and everything that came to mind. Here are some prompts …
What were the highlights of 2022?
The low lights?
Mistakes? Regrets?
Could’ve, would’ve, should’ves
Repeating patterns.
Habits you incorporated that you like.
Habits that aren’t serving you.
Behaviors.
The person teaching this course likened it to a GPS. The GPS needs to know where you are in order to get you to your desired destination.
Once you reflect on 2022 you’re going to release it so that you can create 2023.
If we’re sticking with her GPS metaphor …
You need to actually leave your house in order to get to where you’re going.
If you don’t leave the driveway or parking lot, you’re never going to get to your destination.
So how do we release?
A couple of ways you can do this is by clearing physical and energetic space.
Physical space: You can clean/organize your wallet, purse, closet, drawer, car … choose one and purge away.
I went all in and over the course of a week, I cleaned and de-cluttered my entire place. I donated a lot of things, I sold some and I re-homed others. It felt amazing. I also had my car detailed.
For the energetic component, you can search for a meditation that clears energy. I use Insight Timer (it’s free) and you can also look on YouTube as well.
STEP TWO:
It’s time to determine what you want.
If you’re thinking, “I don’t know what I want”, that may be your conscious mind trying to “protect” you.
You’re going to have to practice allowing yourself to dream. We’ve all experienced disappointments and hurts. But right now, your job is to be honest with yourself and admit what you want. Sometimes it’s easier for people to discover what they want by stating what they don’t want. You can go through every area of your life and write down all the things you don’t want and then go through your list and turn it into the opposite of that.
ie. I hate living in this house. It’s so small and cramped and there’s no storage space.
—> The perfect, spacious 4 bedroom home is in the process of becoming my reality. I’m open and ready to receive all guidance on how I get to live in my dream home that feels so spacious and cozy to me.
Make a list of everything and anything.
And as you’re writing it, don’t worry about how realistic or out there it seems, just get everything out of your head and heart and onto paper or screen.
STEP THREE:
Choose three areas of your life that will have the greatest impact.
You can choose from:
Physical environment
Career/business
Health/fitness
Love life/romance
Personal growth/spiritual development
Finance/Wealth
Friends/Family
Fun/recreation/Entertainment
Now that you have the three areas you’re going to focus on, go through your list from Step Two and place each item you’ve listed under the appropriate heading.
Once you have that done, you’re going to look for the domino effect.
Essentially, it’s the goal that will open other opportunities for you as you achieve it and also accomplish smaller /other goals as you reach it.
For instance, if one of the areas you’re going to focus on is finances/wealth and your list under that category is:
Make $80,000
Buy a house
Put $10,000 in savings
Rent a cottage
The $80,000 would be the domino.
With the $80,000 you could start working toward the other 3 items.
So your only focus is going to be the $80,000.
STEP FOUR:
Take the pressure off.
Have more of a “I want it, but I don’t need it energy” when it comes to your 3 goals.
The reality is that more than likely you don’t need to see your 2023 goals come to fruition.
Up until now you’ve managed to survive without them. You’re here. You may not be thriving and you may be just barely surviving, but you’re still here.
Where you are right now is the base. Anything above that is now a bonus.
Have the mentality of, “I’m creating the best year of my life, for the fun of it.”
Let’s say one of your goals was to get another job and you already have a job.
Your energy would be “I want a better one for the fun of it.”
If one of your goals was to get a house.
Your energy would be “I want a better one for the fun of it.”
A money goal – “ I want more money for the fun of it”
A fitness goal – “I want to be hotter for the fun of it”
A health goal – “I want to have more energy for the fun of it”
Practice saying this to yourself so that you keep your energy around it as fun and expansive.
STEP FIVE:
It’s time to add the specificity component to your goals.
If you follow Human Design and you know whether you’re a specific or non-specific manifestor, it’ll help with how to approach this part of process.
I’m a non-specific manifestor.
If you’d like to know what you are, you just have to know the time you were born and the city.
You can go find out your Human Design Chart here.
The bottom arrow on the right hand side (I’ve put a circle orange around it) will indicate whether you’re specific or non-specific. If it’s pointing to the left you’re specific. If it’s pointing to the right, like mine, you’re non-specific.
If you’re like me, putting in details isn’t your jam. You’d do better by describing how you want to feel.
STEP SIX:
Be hyper aware of the stories you tell yourself.
Think about the relationship your parents/caregivers had with money.
Did you see your parents constantly fight over money?
Did you see your parents work jobs that they hated and then imposed the idea that you have to do things you hate or that you have to work like a dog to make money?
Maybe you grew up with one of your parents being extremely frugal and only bought from sales ore clearance racks.
All these stories/beliefs are going to impact your relationship with money.
My dad would always say, “Money doesn’t grow on trees.”
Some others are:
We don’t get what we always want in life.
Life is hard and it’s unfair. Get over it.
Don’t trust anyone.
Most rich people scam the government and don’t pay the taxes they’re supposed to.
STEP SEVEN:
Who must you become in 2023 in order to see your goals come to fruition?
The version of you who already lives this reality ..what do they believe to be true?
How do they feel about themselves? About money? About success? About love?
How do they treat their money?
How do they treat their time?
What is their perception of themselves?
What do they believe is available/possible for them?
How do they show up in their business? Relationships? Career? Parenting?
How do they take care of themselves when it comes to health and wellness?
How do they eat? Exercise?
What are their self-care rituals?
Who do they spend the most time with?
Whose advice do they and/or don’t they take?
What kind of action did they take to reach their goals?
What is the energy in which they take action?
What did they need to let go of in order to create this reality?
What relationships needed to end? Begin? Continue?
What kind of nervous system regulation tools did they use on a daily basis to overcome challenges along the way?
How do they handle challenges
What kind of mentors do they have?
What do they do in their free time?
What kind of hobbies do they have?
From the perspective of your future self, brainstorm the processes, habits and behaviours that future you engaged in to get there …
ie. Read 7 books on self-love, worked with a therapist, listened to self-love podcasts during walks, car rides and/or while cleaning the house.
The #1 question to ask yourself daily in 2023
What can I do today (right now) to embody (insert your goals)?
Example: What can I do today to embody the 6 figure business owner, dream-home owning, serial investing, travelling and loving partner version of (your name)?
STEP EIGHT:
For each of your goals, answer the following:
The version of (your name) who is ALREADY living this goal, what were the processes, habits, behaviours that led them to that goal?
We don’t always manifest what we want but we always manifest who we are.
We just have to focus on bridging our desires and our identity.
STEP NINE:
Be vigilante on what you’re saying to yourself and to others.
“I don’t want to be broke”
“I’m so broke”
“I hate my job”
“I don’t want to be single anymore”
You’ll keep attracting the same results because it’s what you’re focusing on.
Instead:
I’m increasing my income.
I’m grateful for my job because it gives me some peace of mind knowing I’m making money.
I’m ready for the perfect relationship to come into my life right now.
STEP TEN:
Build a vision board to keep as a screen saver on your computer and/or your phone.
You can use Canva to put it together.
If you like details and specifics, then have fun choosing the specifics of what you want to manifest. Find pictures, images, words that are an exact match (or close to) of what you want.
For my non-specific friends, you can choose images, words and pictures to represent the feeling you want to have with each of the things you want to manifest.
For instance, I don’t have an exact idea of what I want my house to look like but I know how I want to feel when I see it and when I’m in it and so I looked for images that would match that.
Whether you go the specific or non-specific route, make sure to put something on your vision board that has already manifested. This will communicate to your subconscious mind that this vision board is already working for you.
Once you’re done creating your vision board you can either choose to use it for visualization processes or you can just set it as your screensavers and leave it at that.
Okay, that’s it!
Have fun and let me know if you need any clarification with anything.
Here’s to us
